Decisions should be made with a helping of ice cream and a stable mind

Right, as you can see from my title I find those things mandatory in a decision making process. Since I have neither a helping of ice cream nor an often stable mind, decision making is not advised. However the situatuon does not allow it. Nor does money. Previously, I have said the excitement of going to Paris has seriously boiled down to what it really is. It's the poorer girl's who wants a good education substitute for a UK education. I did not want to admit this at all. I even grew resentment and disregard for the UK education and universities. It all seemed exciting at first, but of course excitement dies down right before you officiate the decision and it reveals the truth. Excitement seemed so solid and good and true at the time but slowly, it begins to wither into a mist clouding all the cons of the decisions and the more hurtful unspoken reasons of the decisions. You know? The ones that you ignore purposely, the specks of dust you sweep under the rug. When excitement withers into despair and bad judgment and naive thinking and expectations. The specks of dust seem to have been enlarged and they seem all the more hulking and intimidating. Right now, I feel no tether to Paris, no strong desire to even go there. Let alone study and spend 3 years of my life. Looking at it idyllically and of course through rise coloured glasses, it seems alright and very 'Jolie et très parfait' but really, will it be though?i guess I'll have to trust myself and know that I will try to be happy wherever I am. And remember to pray, because it really, truly does gain me solace and peace of mind. I'm starting to open up about it slowly to people and it feels better to hear it resonate back and then I felt somehow reassure that I wasn't making good decisions. I now know, I really love the UK and France is my second choice. There will no equal substitute for the UK. Desolée France. I love you and all, but the UK is all kinds of wonderful. Hanna's tweet made me think about the US. Personally, I only intend to visit ever since Sandy hit, but whatever really. UK or France really. Now I feel my head and thoughts clearing up and the mist clouding the judgement and reason are beginning to wither and fade away. It's still there, but only gossamer. I suppose I might change my mind once again, I will not wish for it, but evidently it will happen and I hope to Allah I am ready and prepared well for it. Goodnight all.